{"id":46728,"date":"2022-10-26T19:20:20","date_gmt":"2022-10-26T16:20:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wingulamashahidi.org\/?p=46728"},"modified":"2025-05-22T01:36:34","modified_gmt":"2025-05-21T22:36:34","slug":"special-teaching-for-married-couples","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wingulamashahidi.org\/en\/2022\/10\/26\/special-teaching-for-married-couples\/","title":{"rendered":"SPECIAL TEACHING FOR MARRIED COUPLES"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Avoiding Jealousy in Marriage \u2013 Part One: A Word to Wives<\/strong><\/p>\n

This is part of a special series of teachings aimed at helping married couples thrive according to biblical principles. If you missed the previous parts of this series, feel free to reach out to us through the contact information listed at the end of this message.<\/p>\n

Today, we will explore how jealousy can significantly affect the health and peace of a marriage<\/strong>\u2014especially how it can be stirred unknowingly through a woman’s words.<\/p>\n

The Two Types of Jealousy in Scripture<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Biblically, jealousy appears in two distinct forms<\/strong>:<\/p>\n

1. Sinful (Demonic) Jealousy<\/strong><\/h4>\n

This is a form of envy that arises from bitterness or resentment toward another person\u2019s success or blessings. It’s rooted in selfish ambition and covetousness, where someone desires what another has but does not want them to have it.<\/p>\n

The Bible sternly warns against this kind of jealousy:<\/p>\n

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\u201cLet us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy<\/strong>.\u201d
\u2014 Romans 13:13, ESV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

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\u201cThen the high priest and all his associates, who were members of the party of the Sadducees, were filled with jealousy<\/strong>.\u201d
\u2014 Acts 5:17, NIV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

This was the same jealousy that religious leaders had toward Jesus and His apostles when they saw the grace of God powerfully at work in them. Rather than rejoice, they sought to silence and destroy them.<\/p>\n

2. Relational (Godly) Jealousy<\/strong><\/h4>\n

This type of jealousy is natural and even God-ordained<\/strong> within covenant relationships, especially in marriage<\/strong>. It is a protective zeal<\/strong> that seeks to preserve exclusive love and loyalty within the marital union.<\/p>\n

God Himself describes His relationship with His people as jealous<\/strong>, meaning He does not tolerate divided affections:<\/p>\n

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\u201cYou shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the Lord your God am a jealous God<\/strong>…\u201d
\u2014 Exodus 20:5, ESV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

This form of jealousy, when awakened or violated, can lead to severe consequences. It is more intense and dangerous than even anger or rage:<\/p>\n

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\u201cWrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?<\/strong>\u201d
\u2014 Proverbs 27:4, ESV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

In the context of marriage, this is the kind of jealousy that arises when one spouse feels emotionally or relationally displaced<\/strong>, whether through comparisons, flirtations, or misplaced praise.<\/p>\n

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A Woman\u2019s Words Can Ignite Dangerous Jealousy<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Let us now examine a biblical story that illustrates how a woman\u2019s words<\/strong>, even when truthful, can ignite jealousy with grave consequences. Although it\u2019s not a marriage story, it holds valuable insight for married women.<\/p>\n

The Story of Saul and David<\/strong><\/h4>\n

1 Samuel 18:5\u20139<\/em><\/p>\n

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\u201cAnd David went out and was successful wherever Saul sent him, so that Saul set him over the men of war. And this was good in the sight of all the people and also in the sight of Saul\u2019s servants.<\/p>\n

As they were coming home, when David returned from striking down the Philistine, the women came out of all the cities of Israel, singing and dancing<\/strong>, to meet King Saul, with tambourines, with songs of joy, and with musical instruments.<\/p>\n

And the women sang to one another as they celebrated,
\u2018Saul has struck down his thousands,
and David his ten thousands.<\/strong>\u2019<\/p>\n

And Saul was very angry, and this saying displeased him. He said, \u2018They have ascribed to David ten thousands, and to me they have ascribed thousands, and what more can he have but the kingdom?\u2019
And Saul eyed David from that day on.<\/strong>\u201d
\u2014 1 Samuel 18:5\u20139, ESV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Here, we see that Saul initially loved David<\/strong>, but that affection turned into hatred, driven by jealousy. What sparked it?<\/strong> The praise of women.<\/p>\n

Their words were not false \u2014 David had indeed achieved great victories. However, the timing and manner<\/strong> of their praise lacked wisdom. Their careless comparison wounded Saul\u2019s pride and stirred insecurity<\/strong>. The outcome? Saul began to view David as a rival and tried repeatedly to kill him.<\/p>\n

One can only imagine that even David himself may have wished they kept silent, knowing their celebration brought unintended harm.<\/p>\n

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The Lesson for Wives Today<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Women, your words carry power \u2014 especially in marriage. When you praise other men, even casually, more than your own husband<\/strong>, it can spark relational jealousy, insecurity, and even conflict between friends, relatives, or neighbors.<\/p>\n

Even seemingly harmless comments like:<\/p>\n

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\u201cHoney, your friend really dresses well \u2014 he\u2019s so sharp!\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

…can plant seeds of resentment or competitiveness in your husband\u2019s heart, even if you meant no harm.<\/p>\n

Men deeply desire to be admired and respected by their wives<\/strong>. The Bible instructs wives to honor and submit to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22\u201324), and part of that honor involves guarding your praise<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Let your husband be, in your eyes, the best man alive<\/strong>. Even if others seem to surpass him in some areas, don\u2019t highlight those areas openly. Instead, protect his heart by affirming him, appreciating his efforts<\/strong>, and speaking respectfully about others in his presence.<\/p>\n

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\u201cThe wise woman builds her house,
but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.\u201d
\u2014 Proverbs 14:1, NIV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Words spoken without discernment can create division where there was peace, and jealousy where there was love. Therefore, weigh your words carefully<\/strong>, especially when they involve another man \u2014 whether it be someone on television, a co-worker, or a neighbor.<\/p>\n

Remember, jealousy is ignited by small sparks<\/strong> \u2014 and you hold the match.<\/p>\n

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A Final Word: Are You Born Again?<\/strong><\/h3>\n

The greatest security you can ever have \u2014 in marriage and in eternity \u2014 is found in Jesus Christ<\/strong>. The signs of His soon return are all around us. This is not the time to take salvation lightly.<\/p>\n

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\u201cStrive to enter through the narrow door. For many, I tell you, will seek to enter and will not be able.\u201d
\u2014 Luke 13:24, ESV<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Repent from your sins, believe in the Gospel, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins (Acts 2:38). Only in Christ is there true peace, restoration, and eternal life.<\/p>\n

Maranatha \u2014 The Lord is coming.<\/strong><\/p>\n

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