Question:
What is the meaning of Proverbs 27:6: “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy”?
Answer:
The “friend” mentioned here is a true friend—someone who genuinely desires your well-being. When a friend wounds you with honest words, even if painful, it is far better than being flattered by people who are secretly your enemies.
The truth that hurts is actually a manifestation of genuine love, rooted in God’s love. Jesus Himself consistently spoke truth to all people, especially the Pharisees, exposing their hypocrisy (see Matthew 23). While many admired Him superficially in the marketplaces, deep down they rejected and hated Him because of His uncompromising truth.
Similarly, the Apostle Paul reproved the church in Galatia for their readiness to accept only comforting teachings while rejecting the true gospel (Galatians 4:16, ESV):
“Have I then become your enemy by telling you the truth?”
Paul’s sharp correction was necessary for their spiritual growth, even though it was painful for them.
On the other hand, Judas Iscariot betrayed Jesus with a kiss, pretending to be a friend while leading Him to death (John 18:3-5). This illustrates how the kisses or flattering words of an enemy are deceptive and dangerous.
Theological Reflection:
The wounds from a friend represent loving correction—a vital part of Christian community and spiritual growth. Hebrews 12:6 (ESV) says,
“For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.”
This discipline is an expression of God’s perfect love, which often works through His people to bring repentance and restoration.
In contrast, flattery from an enemy is akin to spiritual deception. Proverbs 29:5 warns,
“A man who flatters his neighbor spreads a net for his feet.”
Flattering words without truth can lead one into sin and destruction.
Therefore, it is better to receive the painful but honest counsel of a true friend, grounded in love and truth, than to be deceived by smooth words that conceal harmful intentions.
Summary:
When a brother or sister in Christ lovingly rebukes or corrects you—even if it stings—that is a sign of true friendship and godly love. It builds character, promotes holiness, and leads to life (see Proverbs 27:17; Ephesians 4:15). However, receiving constant praise and flattering words from those who do not have your best interest at heart is dangerous and can lead to spiritual ruin.
May the Lord bless you with wisdom to discern true friends and embrace godly correction.
Shalom.
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